India, Feb. 14 -- Valentine's Day is behind us and it is safe to come out from hiding without being bombarded by offers to buy roses, send chocolates, make dinner reservations, book a mini-break, or propose marriage to your significant other. It is has now become de rigueur to complain about the 'commercialisation' of Valentine's Day - and I do, in fact, complain about that - but what annoys me most about the V Day ad blitz is that I don't really recognise the version of 'romance' that is being sold to us. Not only is it needlessly performative, it also doesn't resemble anyone's lived reality.

So, what, you ask, do I consider to be romantic? What would make the cut if I were looking for romance in a relationship (and who isn't?). Well, h...