India, July 19 -- There is a kind of man who doesn't explain himself. He shows up, keeps things moving; says little, feels less, and never admits weakness.

People see him as strong. A psychologist once told me I come across like that. "The Marlboro Man," he said. That old cowboy from the cigarette ads, always riding into the horizon; no time to pause, no hesitation, no regrets.

I thought that was quite a compliment. Looking back now (as no Marlboro Man would ever do), I have begun to wonder.

In my malleable years, I was taught this was what a man should be. Men don't cry. They keep their emotions close and apologies closer. They use words sparingly to earn respect.

I built my identity around being solid, by these definitions. I don't ...