Setting, March 2 -- Fuel Station Palaver

Setting: A scorching afternoon at a seemingly endless fuel queue in Lagos. Mama Ade and Papa Emeka are neighbors, stuck in their cars, inching forward.

Mama Ade: Papa Emeka! Na you be dis? Ah, dis fuel wahala go kill us one day! See queue, e be like snake wey swallow elephant!

Papa Emeka: Mama Ade! Wetin man go do? Motor don dey nearly drink air. Dem say fuel dey, but e be like say na for oyinbo land dem keep am. Laughs dryly Na only for Naija you go queue to buy wetin you get money for!

Mama Ade: True, true! Even for heaven sef, I sure say queue go dey for gate if dem share free gold. Na our national sport be dis, queuing Olympics! But eh, my back dey break o. Dis good governance wey dem promi...