Nigeria, Feb. 4 -- Me: "Hello, my pal. How are you? To what do I owe this august call in January?"

My friend: "Jide, you're not serious. When last did you call me too?"

Me: "It's true, amigo. I've been busy lately. Man must eat now. As you know, in Naija, no food for lazy man"

My friend: "You're right. Are you at home this weekend? We need to hang out. It's been a while."

Me: "Ah! Wrong time! I am actually in the field doing research for one of my clients."

My friend: "So, what's your field research about?

Me: "It's about the forthcoming June 20, 2026, Ekiti gubernatorial election."

My friend: "What about it?"

Me: "We want to know how the election will pan out."

My friend: "Professor! Jide, please come down to my level o! You kn...