India, Sept. 7 -- In the current phase of human evolution, our existence seems to be engulfed by the uncalled-for influence of varied kinds of exuberant personalities, popularly known as 'influencers'. These internet 'rages' may indeed last only for a week at the lofty pedestals upon which unsolvable algorithms have propelled them. But the benefit (or damage) that their influential screen presence entails is apparent within hours, even minutes, of their reels going viral. Our favourite village or 'gram', namely Instagram, thus presents us with the following sorts of influencers, and their subtle or not-so-subtle variations: The bombarders: These ones are constantly in our faces, ears and even noses, all the time. They insist on popping up when we don't want to even catch a glimpse of them, and they make sure that we feel immense pressure, because of their very existence in our lives. They will stop at nothing, they will never hesitate and they will often have to be shut down even by social media channels. Politics and crime, and all other such insufferable topics, are usually their breeding grounds. The hyperactive ones: These ones are not as intolerable as the bombarders, but they will never hesitate to post anything and everything. From marmalade on toast, to Tai Chi fitness to the benefits of kissing, they will touch every single topic and they will ensure that we can never miss their peppy but often overbearing presence. The jumping jacks: These sorts will never stand still and will never stop jumping around or exercising or gymming or some such thing. They will speak breathlessly and some of them will even entertain us no end, simply by virtue of their general tomfoolery and their habit of running about all over the place, for no apparent reason! The calmness gurus: Although the title 'guru' should ordinarily be bestowed upon truly special human beings, these self-styled 'guru' influencers have made a mark in our lives, simply by espousing what we already should know: the need to stay calm and not lose our cool so often! These exponents of calmness and deep breathing will make us sway calmly to their tunes and will actually benefit us in some ways, even if their techniques might not be authentic. The hilarity prompters: These ones are really funny at times, but rather pathetic at other times. I started following a page that made me fall off my chair laughing once, with a regional dialect and twang to boot. But the said page failed to come up with anything remotely as hilarious in the next few weeks and they certainly lost at least one follower. The analysts: These are the ones who make us believe that they know everything about our food and health, for instance, so amazingly confident are they. A little bit of surface scratching, tends to reveal, however, the shakiness of their assertions and the sheer recklessness with which they often proceed to upload content. A little more care may have resulted in far greater levels of depth and understanding, which would then have been apparent in their presentations. The collectors: Some influencers make their fortunes simply by collecting, collating and presenting information that is already out there, but the consistency of these accounts makes people return repeatedly to them. They make sure that their theme is a popular one like fashion, movies or cricket, and they collect all sorts of visuals to come up with appealing combos which sell like hot cakes. The trendy ones: Often on top of the popularity charts are the trend watchers. The ones who grab hold of a new fad as it tries to whizz past them, and post it to Instagram before anyone can say Jack Robinson, or whatever they say these days. These are the eye catchers and the ones who really bag the eyeballs, even if there are 'bags' under some eyes, because of too much screen time! Celebrity influencers: These are the genuine celebs, the ones who made their name in other ways, before Instagram came into being. They have metamorphosed themselves into being influencers with substantial followings, which tend to last. Prepare to be forever influenced, folks. These influencers are unstoppable!...